Tuesday, April 03, 2007

a special place in my heart

exists for ol' Thomas. Having grown up in a church named for him, and weeing in the stained glass and other artwork depictions of St. Thomas on his knees reaching into Jesus' side, I can't help but feel an affinity for him. He wanted what all the rest of us want, to see Jesus face-to-face. Its not that he didn't want to believe his friends, but rather he too wanted to experience the joy that came from seeing his rabbi, who was dead, among the living.

I'm not sure we can blame him for that. I think calling him "doubting Thomas" takes something away from the fact that we are all subject to doubt once-in-a-while. We all have questions be they about points of doctrine; the virgin birth, Creation, the filioque, the Trinity clause or otherwise; human sexuality, authority of bishops, vestments, whatever. It is ok to ask questions. It is ok to doubt. It is ok to struggle. Thomas is not chastised for his wanting to see and touch Jesus, but rather Jesus expresses the will of God, that we might believe without seeing. Its not that God doesn't want us to come to faith intellectually, but God wants trust, God wants faith, God wants relationship. A relationship is hard to sustain when one said is constantly doubting the other. Yet a relationship with God withstands all doubt and all testing. So Thomas wanted to see Jesus. I too would find this whole thing a lot easier if I got to touch Jesus' hands and side, but alas, that is not my lot in life. Instead, I'll question and I'll doubt from time to time, but I take solace in the blessing that comes from not seeing but believing.

Monday, April 02, 2007

the evolution of faith

Three portions of the Lectionary for Easter 2 struck me today.

1) When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, "Peace be with you."

2) The high priest questioned them, saying, "We gave you strict orders not to teach in this name, yet here you have filled Jerusalem with your teaching and you are determined to bring this man's blood on us" But Peter and the apostles answered, "We must obey God rather than any human authority."

3) Almighty and everlasting God, who in the Paschal mystery established the new covenant of reconciliation: Grant that all who have been reborn into the fellowship of Christ's Body may show forth in their lives what they profess by their faith; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

The Apostles, still unsure what to believe in John 20 have locked themselves in a room, fearful of those who killed their rabbi and friend. By Acts 5 they are so sure of their faith that they choose to obey God over the threat of punishment. What made them so confident? Faith! Like the Collect of Easter 2 says, they "showed forth in their lives what they professed by their faith." These men and women moved from fear to action in mere minutes through the power of Jesus Christ. What keeps us from action? What fears hold us at bay? Only Christ Jesus will move us to a life lived by faith.